Thursday, February 4, 2010

Cross your fingers for me!

Ok so my first no eat thursday is here and so far so good. I haven't eaten anything and I am just waiting for the line to die down in my favorite coffee shop and then I am going to get myself and Americano. I am not eating, but I still need caffeine. I think the hardest part is going to be the exercising. I know I am going to be tired and shaky and really run down by the time I should be getting a work out in, but I need to power through it. If I can do this then I can do anything! The next day where I will be doing this will be Sunday : ) so hopefully I find out that this isn't too too bad so I am not dreading sunday. Something has finally clicked in me that I can do this. Like I really can. What I am secretly really worried about is even if I do lose this weight that I still won't look good, that my legs will still be junky : (. Like what if this is the way my bones are? What if these big bulky muscles won't go away? What if after all this hard work I am still not happy? Those are my biggest fears. What if this isn't good enough? All the sacrifices, all the hunger pains, fending off these awful cravings, not eating anything I want, exercising until I feel light headed, it's all for nothing? This is what is always in the back of my head. I hate it!!!!!! But I guess I will never know until I try right? So I might as well go for it. Send me positive energy!

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