Ok so I have a new plan. I am going to eat 500 calories a day and still work off 1800 calories a day and not eat on thursdays and sundays. If I stick to this diet then I will be down 40 pounds by spring break!!!!!!!!! Even like 30 by spring break would be...awesome. My spring break is in 40 days, SO that's almost a pound a day, geez louise! It's like 6.8 pounds a week. That's if I stick to my diet strictly and really do this. I can't fail anymore. I can't keep giving up and saying "I will start tomorrow", it hurts my heart every time I do that. If you have ever failed a diet you know what I mean. That feeling of like oh shit great I hate myself. It's so much self loathing. It's not good. I am sick of laying in my bed and concocting a new plan and dreaming of looking skinny and gorgeous. I want to finally be those things! I need to be those things! It's my time to shine. I let everyone else shine in high school and now it's my time. My number one priority now is me, myself, and I. I come first. My happiness, wellness, and weight come first. I should be the god damn center of my own fricken life! MY TIME!